I Raise My Eyes to Say Yes

Did You Know?

• Sienkiewicz-Mercer appeared on Maria Shriver's Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow and on The Joan Rivers Show.
• An Italian edition titled Alzo Gli Occhi Per Dire Si was published in 2022 by Homeless Book.
• She received an Individual Achievement Award from the National Council on Communicative Disorders in spring 1990.

Author and background

Ruth Sienkiewicz-Mercer (1950–1998) was an American quadriplegic and disability rights activist. She lived at home with her parents, at a private facility, and later at Belchertown State School. She began working on the book in 1976, creating an outline and several pages of roughly drawn anecdotes while at Belchertown. In January 1979, she met coauthor Steven B. Kaplan through the FREE (Fundamental Right to Equal Education) program, which assigned him to help complete her autobiography. Sienkiewicz-Mercer communicated via word boards using sounds and facial expressions, including raised eyes for yes and a curled frown for no. Kaplan wrote most of the words, but the emotions, thoughts, and impressions were hers; she reviewed several drafts. He included words or phrases she created, such as "SHARI.DOL.GRETL.SOAP." Kaplan independently verified details of her story. On her wishes in 1986, an attendant gave the manuscript to Houghton Mifflin Harcourt editor Richard Todd at a writer's conference. The book was completed in 1988 after almost two thousand hours of work. A 1996 revised edition was published by Whole Health Books.

Synopsis

I Raise My Eyes to Say Yes recounts the life of Ruth Sienkiewicz-Mercer, from her happy childhood through her abuse at Belchertown State School and life after leaving. Born on September 23, 1950, she contracted encephalitis at five weeks old, leading to cerebral palsy. After therapy at home and at Lakeville Hospital, where a psychologist diagnosed her as an imbecile despite normal cognition, she spent three and a half years at Crotched Mountain Rehabilitation Center. Due to financial shortages and her father's belief that institutionalization was best, she was admitted to Belchertown on May 14, 1962. There, a doctor again misdiagnosed her as an imbecile. Nurses force-fed her tasteless pulp while she lay on her back. She was diapered until early 1972 despite being toilet trained, and wore a johnny until spring 1966. The institution was chronically understaffed; on Ward 4, three staff handled thirty residents. She became depressed.

Reception

I Raise My Eyes to Say Yes received positive reviews, with reviewers calling it remarkable, moving, or extraordinary. Sue Scheible of The Patriot Ledger said it would alter perceptions of handicaps, while Ronni Scheier of The New York Times Book Review stated that those with disabilities living in silence might find a voice in the book. V. L. Stonehouse of The Grand Rapids Press praised Sienkiewicz-Mercer's honest descriptions of her romantic life. Josie Rawson in The Valley Advocate categorized the book as an exposé of her treatment and of an educational system reducing handicapped individuals to non-human levels. Critics noted its sad but uplifting quality; Kirkus Reviews called it melancholy and inspirational. Beryl Lieff Benderly of The Washington Post described it as far sadder than The Good Soldier. Herbert Mitgang of The New York Times noted the autobiography was narrated with hardly any bitterness. Beverly Slapin in the San Francisco Chronicle found it astounding she maintained her sanity, wit, and humor. Belchertown's cruelty was noted by several critics, with Susan Craighead of the Courier Journal calling it an American gulag. C. Rodney James of Worklife magazine said the book went beyond a survival tale.

Analysis

G. Thomas Couser, writing in Style, viewed collaborative autobiographies as invoking literary ethics, comparing I Raise My Eyes to Say Yes to a slave narrative in that Sienkiewicz-Mercer emancipates herself from the facility due in part to the disability rights movement. He noted the difference in literary ability between Sienkiewicz-Mercer (first-grade reading level) and Kaplan (college educated), stating Kaplan created a work she could never have produced, which misrepresents her true voice. Tom Coogan reviewed similar issues of authority and authenticity in the Journal of Literary & Cultural Disability Studies. In another text, Couser identified the autobiography as part of a wave of 1990s disability narratives. He called it not a narrative of restitution or rehabilitation, but one where the world adjusts to her disabilities and she liberates herself through word-board communication. He cited the book as both an autoethnography with postcolonial notes and a testimonio, where Sienkiewicz-Mercer represents other disabled individuals as a class.