Tentacles of Doom
Three bishops visit; plumbing fails; one dies.
"Tentacles of Doom" is the ninth episode of the Channel 4 sitcom *Father Ted*, and the third episode of its second series. In the episode, Ted attempts to fix the plumbing in the Craggy Island parochial house when he learns that the Holy Stone of Clonrichert is being upgraded to a "class two relic" by the Vatican. Three bishops are sent to perform the ceremony and will stay at the house, prompting Ted to insist that Dougal and Jack behave. Ted instructs Dougal to discuss only Church matters, and trains Jack—with the promise of a drink—to give simple replies like "yes" and "that would be an ecumenical matter" to any question.
The bishops—O'Neill, Facks, and Jordan—arrive, and the ceremony proceeds without incident. Afterwards, the group splits into pairs. Dougal tells O'Neill about his doubts regarding organized religion and the Catholic Church. Bishop Facks, impressed by Jack's "views," jabs Jack with his finger in excitement, which enrages Jack; Jack responds by shoving the Holy Stone up Facks' rectum. Meanwhile, Ted excuses himself from Bishop Jordan to use the toilet, but the faulty plumbing causes water to erupt from a drain in the yard where Jordan is standing. The elderly bishop suffers a heart attack and dies.
Later, Ted and Dougal watch the three bishops depart: O'Neill, now calling himself "Eddie," has left the Church to become a hippie; Facks is taken away in an ambulance to have the Holy Stone removed from his rectum; and a hearse carries Jordan's casket. After they have gone, Ted reflects on the visit, remarking: "Went pretty well, I thought."
Quick Facts
- Series
- Father Ted
- Series No
- 2
- Episode
- 3
- Airdate
- 22 March 1996
- Director
- Declan Lowney
- Writer
- Graham Linehan / Arthur Mathews
- Photographer
- Chris Owen
- Editor
- Mykola Pawluk / Tim Waddell
- Guests
- Malcolm Douglas and Mark O'Regan as 2 Vatican Priests / Kevin Moore as Bishop Eddie O'Neill / Denys Hawthorne as Bishop Facks / Paddy Ward as Bishop Jordan / Tony Guilfoyle as Father Larry Duff
- Episode List
- List of Father Ted episodes
- Prev
- Think Fast, Father Ted
- Next
- Old Grey Whistle Theft
Facts from the source article.
Lore & Background
In the episode, Ted attempts to fix the parochial house plumbing when he learns the Holy Stone of Clonrichert is being upgraded to a class two relic. Three bishops—O'Neill, Facks, and Jordan—arrive to perform the ceremony. Ted instructs Dougal to discuss only Church matters and trains Jack to reply with "yes" or "that would be an ecumenical matter" in exchange for drink.
During the ceremony, Dougal shares doubts about organized religion with O'Neill, while Facks jabs Jack in excitement, causing Jack to shove the Holy Stone up Facks' rectum. Later, Ted excuses himself to use the toilet; his flush causes water to erupt over a drain where Bishop Jordan stands, giving the elderly bishop a fatal heart attack.
Afterward, O'Neill leaves the Church to become a hippie, asking to be called "Eddie"; Facks is taken by ambulance to have the stone removed; and a hearse carries Jordan's casket. Ted remarks, "Went pretty well, I thought."
Reader's Guide
The episode exemplifies the irreverent humor of Father Ted, blending clerical absurdity with physical comedy. Its plot hinges on miscommunication and unintended consequences, such as Jack's violent reaction to being jabbed and Ted's plumbing mishap causing a bishop's death. The episode's title, "Tentacles of Doom," references a fictional film mentioned earlier in the series, though the episode itself does not feature tentacles. The episode is notable for its darkly comic resolution, where Ted considers the disastrous visit a success. It remains a fan-favorite for its sharp satire of religious bureaucracy and the chaos that ensues when authority figures are placed in mundane, flawed settings.
Did You Know?
- The Holy Stone of Clonrichert is upgraded to a class two relic by the Vatican in this episode.
- Bishop Facks has the Holy Stone shoved up his rectum by Jack.
- Bishop Jordan dies of a heart attack after Ted's toilet flush causes water to erupt over him.
- Bishop O'Neill leaves the Church to become a hippie and asks to be called 'Eddie'.
More in Father Ted episodes 1-24
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